"When you start training your dog (or dating a man), it is a good idea to have three bottom-line rules that you enforce no matter what . . ."
DOGS No sleeping on the bed. No jumping up on people. No eating people's food.
MEN Be consistent. Have a sense of humor. Be financially self-sufficient.
Hilarious, insightful, witty, and wise, Clare Staples is saying what most women have been thinking. And in Everything I Know About Men I Learned From My Dog, the former model and party girl turned relationship expert proves that what works for the four-legged companion in a woman's life can work equally well for the two-legged variety. Divided into immediately evident categories, such as "Selecting a Breed" and "How to Stay the Boss," and packed with good-humored observations and practical advice, Everything I Know About Men I Learned From My Dog is the perfect field guide to any girl's two most complicated companions -- her dog and her man.
From choosing the right personality to figuring out your companion's quirks and idiosyncrasies, dog ownership and human relationships can be complex affairs. What do you do when he bares his teeth or is a little clingy? How do you reward him when he is good and scold him when he is naughty? With Clare Staples's simple, clever tips, your relationships with both species will be happier and more successful.
DON'T GO FOR LOOKS
MAN: Handsome men are never a great bet. Often they have learned to rely on their looks and have not had to develop a personality or sense of humor -- far more important qualities.
DOG: Don't choose a dog for looks alone. Looks are only skin-deep -- loyalty, devotion, and eagerness to please and unconditional love are the most wonderful things.
DON'T CHANGE YOUR LIFESTYLE
MAN: When you first meet your man, don't change anything for him. Don't give up your friends or hobbies. Never cancel anything to be with him.
DOG: When you first get a dog, chances are he will whine when you leave him alone, but he'll get used to it and appreciate you more when you spend quality time with him.
GIVE POSITIVE REWARDS
MAN: When your man does something that you like -- such as brings you a present -- reward him. Give him a treat, spoil him.
DOG: All dogs love praise. Train a dog with positive rewards for positive behavior.
"By the simple act of comparing men to dogs, Staples has achieved what a hundred years of psychology and self-help books haven't: She has finally made the male sex comprehensible." -- Candace Bushnell, author of Sex and the City